We are many who were raised under this system of punishing emotional beliefs, being conditioned from a very early age to feel emotionally bad under certain conditions.
What Is Guilt And How Do We Inoculate It?
When someone gives us a message in order to make us feel “bad people”, for having done or said something “inappropriate”, we respond immediately with a feeling of discomfort and punishment.
This is mainly because our mind responds automatically to what is learned during childhood. Some of the psychological systems of guilt we employ in our lives are as follows.
Residual guilt is that learned during our childhood, since parents often use it every day to manipulate us with reproaches like,” I won’t love you if you do that again “or”you should feel ashamed of that attitude.” These phrases can echo in our adult self in figures such as bosses or paternal images, it can also be evidenced in our relationships as a couple, where reproaches of the past come to light. This feeling of guilt is reflected in our persistent attempt to get the approval of these figures.
Self-imposed guilt is not necessarily connected to our childhood. Here people feel immobilized by issues experienced during adulthood, self-imposed guilt caused by not following “adult behavior” or” adult moral code”. The person may have a bad mood for a long time, even though the pain of guilt can do nothing to change the situation. These are reflected in our discussions with someone, or by engaging in behavior contrary to others.
Examining The Concern
Remember that the worry is a feeling that immobilizes you in the present for something that has not yet happened and as it says its word pre (before) occupation, means before any occupation, so we must focus our attitude in dealing with adversity rather than worry. It is essential not to make mistakes in making plans by falling into thoughts of fear and anxiety.
Again it all starts with the erroneous idea that concern is closely related to love and importance to others, this can be evidenced in phrases such as: “I worry because I love you” or “you must worry about your future”. But worry has no relation to love and importance, as this emotion only causes anxiety and suffering in our life.
Releasing Our Negative Emotions
To leave negative emotions like guilt and worry, we must commit ourselves to live our present moment. Learning to live in the now helps us not to waste our moments with neurotic thoughts and to be able to see life in a more constructive and rational way.
Now that you already have a greater sense of the psychological system that exists behind these negative emotions, you will be able to work better with your emotions in pursuit of a less manipulative personal development and more committed to your own happiness.