Shame is a sense of embarrassment or exposure. In many cases, it is caused by a violation of the privacy, for example by dishonest and indecent acts that do not comply with social norms or expectations. Pubic feelings are often accompanied by vegetative physical phenomena, such as blush, palpitation, but also by lowering the gaze, the deepest complacency, especially in the loss of honor and attention.

Shame conflicts and shame experiences can leave traumatic effects in the child’s sexual life in which there is nothing more objectionable, for example, socially accepted forms, moral values, and norms of sexual arousal. The reason: Sexual shame has been planted in the soul since the beginning of life – unlike the animals. See Genesis 3: 7:

“Then they both opened their eyes, and they realized that they were naked. They sewed fig leaves together and made protection“. So Adam and Eve realized that they were naked..

Psychologists distinguish between internalized and externalized feelings of shame. While external shame is based on the assumption that other people might evaluate the person as inferior, weak, or inadequate, the internalized shame focuses on their own devaluation – perhaps because of a self-inflicted obstacle.

An Example Of “Preliminary” Traumatisation

In the spring of this year, I took a Bus towards california. A group of children between 7 and 9 years, accompanied by a teacher, were also on the bus. They were loud and cheerful. Then I noticed that a 9-year-old boy began to paint the boy sitting on his thighs  and opposite him and his hands touched the other child’s hands, while the other appeared to be hesitant and with a bashful smile.

The teacher (or educator), who watched the scene from a distance, joined the two, and 2 encouraged them to do so. A boy next to me lowered his gaze to the ground and remained silent. Suddenly, the boys and girls began to laugh at him. The teacher didn’t protect him.

In this context, I recall an article from the Thurgauer Zeitung on “sex education in Kindergarten”. In the article, a part of the method was introduced, how the Scouts proceed to help the children to achieve healthy sexuality. One of the questions for children is: “where would you like to be touched?”(June 2018)

I see it as follows: “enlightenment” of this kind can lead to later sexual misconduct in infants because they are conditioned “(trained”) and unnecessarily draw children’s attention to the pleasure-generating erogenous zones of the body. There is a risk of addiction, especially in children who do not grow up in stable conditions.

Graduated in Psychology from the Stanford University, with a Master's Degree in Child and Adolescent Clinical Psychopathology. Specialized in Neurodevelopment Disorders. Currently working as a child psychiatrist.

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